Hi Roz, I am new to these forums so don't know if you'll get this.
Congrats about stating the abusive relationship from your dad and the sensitivity that you are having with your partner's anger. You have got courage and guts to let us, here in cyber space know.

Anger is an emotion to express the injustices of evil, hurtful and frustrating actions.
It is scary when Anger, (in fact any emotion), that has been used to manipulate, cajole, ridicule, mock, intimidate, harass, control, persuade, terrorize etc... Is used as a WEAPON to attack. In other words, THE emotion is not being expressed in a way that makes the other feel SAFE.

Do you feel safe with your partner?
Do you feel unsafe with the emotion ANGER?
Do you feel unsafe with the way he overtly (openly) DISPLAYS his anger: loud, thumping things, rambling and mumbling and bumbling?
Do you TRUST him enough to let him know HOW his expression of anger, makes you feel.... (sad, uncomfortable, unsafe, hurt, fearful, confused,).
That it reminds you of your UNSAFE and UNLOVED, childhood.
If he is a truly compassionate, caring and thoughtful person, he would apologize, ask for forgiveness, and try to be CAREFUL when he is angry and let you know that he is angry.

If you have great trust in your relationship, You can try stating the obvious:
"You look angry."
"Are you angry about......"
"Was it very important to you?"
"Can I help?"
" Can I play some music, or make you a cup of tea, or cook dinner, or get some take away or give you a glass of wine, or run a warm bath to help?"
"Should I give you some alone time and come back in half an hour?"

You state that you are CONFUSED. Maybe the confusion is your memory of "when dad was angry.... you were personally attacked, blamed and shamed." You were never PROTECTED from his controlling GAME or his WEAPON.

Now the anger is vented, and HISTORY could be repeating again.... but you are NOT PERSONALLY attacked, blamed and shamed, this time (I am guessing???) because you are still in the relationship.

Your physical memory imbedded in your cellular structure remembers "be prepared to receive the personal attacks and brace yourself for it. Be prepared to fight or flight."

Your confusion is: SEEING Anger vented, therefore where is the LOVE?
The LOVE is ARE YOU SAFE? No hurt, harm, shame, blame, personal attacks?
He OWNS his emotion and is choosing to be responsible and mature about it because He believes YOU ARE NOT TO BE BLAMED etc.... It is something else.

CHECK YOUR STATE OF SAFENESS.

IF IT IS NOT GOOD, IF YOU ARE HURT, HARMED AND BRUISED PHYSICALLY AND SHATTERED EMOTIONALLY INTO FEAR.... GET OUT OF THE RELATIONSHIP.

Hope this helps.