Thanks Sanity.

It's not that I need the 'spies' LOL more that I don't want to push him into a decision by saying "dump her or else" when I am not sure I even want him. I want him to make these changes on his own accord - in a way to prove to me that he's not playing games.
I will run if I think he is lying in the slightist (that word looks weird so I'm not sure it is a word now??)
I think my main aim in meeting him is to put my feelings tore st once and for all.