just my $0.02, and maybe because i am the suspicious you know what that I am,

I am coming to the conclusiion that the reason my T doesn't answer me in a timely manner is precisely because she knows it is such a trigger for me, and wants to watch what happens.

If she changed her ways, and responded within a day or two, I wouldn't blow up, and she wouldn't know if my calm was just because of lack of trigger, or whether I have finally worked through what lies at the bottom of the reaction to the trigger.
signed - LabRat (not having a very good day with this, can you tell)

Your experience may of course be very different.