Myers, you are correct about Sam Vaknin. I was incorrect, probably, in posting that article because of the man's controversy, however, the descriptions fit the person it took me so long to recover from.

And, as Zelev has so insightfully described in her own behavior -- the need to please has been a big part of mine as well, along with a history of abuse at the hands of my mother, physically (daily) and emotionally. ( Gosh, I hate writing that! )

Also, what Zelev said in this passage applies to me as well:
I spend an obsessive amount of my day putting up a facade that I have everything under control and I am just as normal as everybody else. I sacrifice what I want searching for praise and approval and then get frustrated and angry because I feel people don't appreciate what I've done for them. I do this regardless of whether I feel you like me or not. Many times, the more I think you dislike me; the harder I will try to get your approval. From what I've read, the "sacrificing part", would make me perfect for an N.

I have to say, Zelev, this shows remarkable insight into my own behavior as well. I'm going to commend and congratulate you on being so far ahead of the game (than I was!) at your age.

Patty