gosh. i've even done university english and would have needed someone to tell me what that meant. and because i'm a little word-nerd, i looked up the etymology, and "ornery" comes from "ordinary" so perhaps in some ways...?

re: when to say "You must be feeling xyz" vs "are you feeling xyz". when i did my training to become a crisis counsellor, we spent about a month practicing these skills and learning the difference. like perna said, you can kind of paraphrase what a client is saying "no one is around", "i have no friends", "i try to meet up with people and no one ever replies" etc and guess that they might be feeling lonely. of course, tone of voice comes into it to (most of our communication is nonverbal anyway) so i wouldn't be saying that to someone who is yelling the above statements at me. for some clients who really didn't like having their feelings identified, i would often say something like "i'm not sure how it is for you, but if i was in that situation i would feel xyz" and it was sometimes enough of an invitation for them to agree or clarify (some people positively delighted in telling me i was wrong ), or for people who just "DON'T DO FEELINGS!!!!" it was something they could possibly reflect on later (in private) and we could continue the conversation.