What we feed in to ourselves is what we get out. If you constanly tell yourself all the things that you have written then that, myfriend, is all you are going to be. HOW can anyone possibly be a winner if they think day in and day out that they are a loser? It is not possible.

I have the same problem with friendship. I wonder to myself why I feel so lonely and know that I put myself in the postion. I do not trust people. Trusting people is arisk. I did that once and risked a lot and am still hurting. Regardless, Friendship is a lot of work. Some people have different expectations then the other. Some people just want a person on the ohter end of the phone to make them feel less lonely. Some people want someone to do things with. Some want a secret sharer. It varies from person to person. I think the two people define the friendship. I think it developes naturally and therefor I think you might be thinking too much about it. But then again, I don't have friends. I don't call people back. I hate leaving my house to go places.

In the end, you can either break free from the chains that bind you and be free or you can stay prisoner. What do you want more? Change is scary.

I don't think you are stupid or what not because you have a very nice clarity to your writing. Most people who are uneducated can't spell or be grammarically correct. (one would think I were )

I am jsut rambling but you know what, you can if you think you can. The only person in your way is you. POSTIVE THINKING=Postive results.