I really am not sure... I think that is why I am trying to stay strong and distance myself emotionally from it all.
I don't know what I want to be honest.
I haven't eaten properly since Sunday - i didn't need to have that as an added stress atm. Work is flat out busy (which is good cos it takes my mind off everything) and I have deadlines that are impossible to met so not eating properly isn't helping how I feel... I am trying really hard to keep 'stable' in my head.
I know I love him still - not 'in love' with him... that would come back if we were together I know.. but the main question going through my mind is "what about the future???"
Also there is a huge possibility that he will do nothing more now that he has told me he misses me... and that frightens me so much. If he does nothing then I will hate him for even telling me in the first place - I was really in recovery and now I feel confused again.