I ask myself this question a lot. Why we are here? What is our purpose in life? I was born to live, but my destiny is to die. The answer is different for everyone. How you find the reason is where I am lost. I am only 21 right now, yes I'm still young. But my age does not tell you who I am. That is another question that floats in my head. Who am I? What is the purpose as to my arrival in this maddening world? Do I even have a purpose? Why as a child I was carefree and happy and now seclusion? I do not understand who I am. I feel as though I am lost in darkness all alone with no one around, hearing nothing. I live with my mom, but she has no idea what I do. She knows nothing of me. No one in my family knows what I do. My hobbies, my likes and dislikes. It's almost as if I'm just an extra head around. Why can't I sleep? I can't be an insomniac, but for some reason, sleeping is very hard for me. Many times I wonder if I am really part of this family. Or if I even deserve a family. This is looking more like the rantings of an immature child. How pathetic am I? Most of the time I am in my room all alone. So when a "friend" calls, I eagerly wait for them to come over. But sometimes, when they are over, I observe them. They would take advantage of me and steal money thinking I wouldn't notice. I don't know how to confront them. If I do, I'm worried that then I will be truly alone. And I don't want that. So I keep quiet and act like nothing happened. I don't know if my problem is even a problem. And I don't know what to do to solve it. Being alone, is greater than any other fear I have.