found this site by accident... took the sainity quiz which only confirmed what i have known for years, although i am surprised it is not much higher.

i really dont know what to say... it was suggested i seek help, but i cant afford help. last time i talked to anyone that tried to honestly help me was when i was in the army (right before i got my medical discharge) and right after my second attempt to end my life (although he thought i did it by accident and closed the case)... that was well over 15 years ago.

i would love to get help... but i have no idea how and i have no money to pay for it. insurance is too expensive, i have to support a family and the only insurance i can afford comes with a 2k deductable... which means its useless.

i am sorry if i sound like i am complaining or whining.