Yes, I need to get it out. I need to tell my story, it's what it led me to tell my T I as ready to do trauma work last fall. I can't explain it other than to say there is someone in me, some part of me, that has been silent about this too long and she needs to have her voice heard. She needs to tell her story and share her burden.

But we aren't doing trauma work anymore. I don't feel like I can talk about this stuff in T unless we have arranged ahead of time for it to be a "trauma session". I'm not sure exactly why I feel that way, but I do. Maybe it's partly because I'm in DBT and the sessions are fairly structured, and maybe it's partly because I've always let my T steer the ship so to speak. But I don't feel like I can go into my session on Monday and say "I need to talk about this". I think that would not go well. I have to wait until she says it's ok. And that sucks.