Thank you for your replies! I feels good to find people that understand. I am on my meds, I have been going to my doctor. You can say Im stable now compared to the way I was before meds. But I feel it gets harder everyday! I was thinking of trying psycotherapy again,havent had much luck with it but, maybe this time Ill find the right person. thanks again for paying attention to me, I was telling to myself while writing my post " no one is going to care, you are writing to yourself" that little voice that makes me feel down. Im glad the "VOICE" was not right this time