Thank you very much everyone for your replies, they mean so much at a time like this. It feels like this has been the longest day ever, like weeks, even though everything horrible just happened this morning. I have tried to do normal things today to keep my mind off things - go for a walk, play basketball with my siblings. The thoughts still linger though. It's going to feel weird going to school tomorrow...academics seem so meaningless. Everything does.

I have to appear strong during this time, because somewhat of a crisis happened in our family just this morning. It would be selfish for me to concern my family with more stuff.