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Originally Posted by Belle1979
I love him.. I'm a loser I know but I love him.....
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You are not a loser and no self deprecating labels are going to let you off the hook. Sorry but we want better for you than that. Yes you love him but he abuses your love so what does it matter at the end of the day. You love him but he doesn't love you back the same way or you would be married with kiddlets playing in the back yard by now.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Belle1979
I know that I am not really giving myaelf a chance at finding happiness while I am in limbo over Mark but I don't know what to say/do. If there was a chance that he was genuine and made amends then I would like the chance to try again  |
Genuine about what? Make amends about what? You told him he had a chance to fix things; that you were open to trying to work things out again and still he strings you along. You give him this long timeline while you wait. He holds all the cards while you wait. He sleeps with her while you wait. He is engaged to her while you wait.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Belle1979
He didn't actually cheat on me... I know sounds like I am making excuses even as I write this.... He did end things with me before he started dating her... it's just that he didn't tell me he was seeing anyone and he went about it a VERY wrong way.. having her in the house etc... I don't know that I will ever forget that but I think I can forgive it...
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I guess that is a matter of perspective Belle. They sure moved fast if nothing was going on before he broke off with you. Seems to me something had to be going on between them before he finally broke it off with you. I just wonder how long she was nagging on him to break off with you before he finally did.
The contact he is having with you constitutes cheating on Lisa in my book. I know I would have issues if my man was talking with his former girlfriend about their breakup. Telling her he misses her, misses them.... was so confused. Unless he is telling her about his contact with you I call it cheating. It is deceptive and shows a real lack of character.
I am sorry Belle you still see hope in a future with Mark. I know the feeling of holding onto false hope and I hate to see you in that place when it is so obviously futile.
Not only that but he just doesn't seem worth it.
I know its hard but truly it won't get easier until you let go and move on. See him for who he is and measure him up to what you need from a life partner. Image that love you have for him being directed at someone worthy. Someone honourable and trustworthy and capable of real love. How marvelous would your life be?
You will love another Belle as or even more intensely as you have loved Mark. I promise you that. If you command it you will find someone who gives it all back to you more than you ever knew with Mark. You just have to believe yourself worthy of such a love. YOu really are worthy Belle. We see it and so will others once you take Mark of the pedistal you have put him on.
Love you Belle and I am sorry if my straight talk is hitting too hard. I am just anxious for your life to get out of the holding pattern it is in because of Mark's hold on you. You deserve so much better.