shoez,

Nice to see you re-posted.

I hope you can post whenever you want/need to and not feel nervous.

I agree with what others have posted to you here.... and I'd like to add, they are very wise members too.

You seem to be on a path towards finding healing and I think that is a very good direction to be going.

I had to learn at a very young age that "I" am my own best advocate, that's how it is as an adult for sure-- but sometimes children have to take the reigns and be their own best guide/parent. I'm not sure how old you are but it's never too early to be your own best support.
Believe in yourself and listen to your heart.

thinking of you

fins