I will start out by saying that I am a guy, I want to make that clear so there is no confusion due to the forum name.

I don't know you or your history well enough to pass any sort of judgment on your relationship so please don't think that I am judging.

I served in the military for a long while and given the environment I watched many guys with a controlling personality type in their relationships. Not only can I tell you from watching it multiple times but also just the fact that psychology tells us that abusive relationships don't tend to start out that way. Also the only types of abuse aren't just physical or directly aggressive in nature (like screaming or some types of mental abuse).

I have seen a couple of relationships where it was the long term passive aggressive sort of mental abuse that took a toll. It never seems like much to start with but in one case a guy I knew dealt with it for nearly ten years, then shot himself in the head. He was constantly accused of cheating and other things, some of which you have described experiencing.

I say this simply because I want to let you know that while it might not seem so bad right now, it can get worse. Sometimes the things that don't seem so bad have a way of building up.

I would suggest that you step back, take a good honest look at your relationship and see how you really feel about it. Take a look at how his treatment is effecting you and ask yourself if in total the relationship is a positive thing for you.

These things aren't easy to think about, we don't always see the answers we want but you deserve better than to let someone else be a detriment to your life. A relationship is supposed to be a largely positive experience, sure there will always be problems but that doesn't mean you have to put up with things if you aren't happy, or they are making your life worse.

Whatever your decisions, I wish you luck.