I'm thinking, they are putting their values, wants/needs on to you.... that's why it's so important to them-- because they are making it about them, in a way.
they probably think how it would feel to them if they were in your place-- instead of thinking how YOU feel in your place.

I think people(ignorantly) do this out of love - they don't wish for you to feel bad, not realizing that you perhaps aren't feeling bad.

I think maybe if you try to look at it that they love and care about you and leave it at that-- then maybe such attitudes are a bit easier to swallow.

I agree with what Salukigirl said--

best to you
fins