I think what others have posted to you is very good advice/ideas.

I'm sorry you feel so low about yourself

It's up to you, as I do like it-- but-- ummmm... well your screen name could maybe hold you down too-- as a reminder of how your rate-- siempre nada(always nothing)....... maybe-- "siempre algo"(always something) would help lift you up?? just an idea....

wishing you peace and sunshine

fins