Hi, Alexandria04!
Quote:
Originally Posted by Alexandria04
Am I a horrible person?
|
It's true; I don't know whether or not you're a horrible person. Committed any mass murder or genocide lately? Have you a body count at least in the hundreds? If not - just my opinion, your degree of horribleness is not of the highest order.
(My point: there's "horrible," and then there's HORRIBLE!)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Alexandria04
I thought I had gotten over most of my self-esteem issues a few years ago but now I just find myself thinking you are an ugly, fat person that is of no use to anyone. I know that's not true. ... Why am I feeling this way? ... Why can't I just get it together?
|
I have to speak as a person who has fallen and never gotten up. I still ask myself those two questions, "Why am I feeling this way?" and "Why can't I just get it together?" My meds, however, drain me of caring much about the answers to those questions.
Therefore answers have I none, but I can speculate till the cows come home.
The model of the "rational vs. emotional brain" has its appeal. Though it dwells below our consciousness most of the time, the emotional brain usually prevails in head-on battle with our rationality, possibly because it's closer to our deepest urges involving raw survival.
As a person with a mental illness, I strongly suspect - whether by nature, nurture, or pathology - my emotional brain isn't functioning right, and the chemistry of depression further enhances the dominance of that emotional brain over the rational.
Whether the above has any validity at all, I'm still left with the questions - no, with the statements, "I am feeling this way" and "I can't just get it together."
Time for drugs...
__________________
My dog
mastered the "fetch" command. He would communicate he wanted something, and I would fetch it.