belle, i had mentioned an author to you recently, harriet lerner. she is a psychologist specializing in how women deal with things and she seems rather brilliant. i've been reading her book the dance of intimacy and just read a section that made me think of your situation. she talks about triangles but not necessarily in the sense of love triangles. she said it happens in all types of relationships and is just a way people manage anxiety. you might want to check it out. i'm learning a lot from her. another interesting thing she said is that sometimes people freak out and do something crazy because of some other unrelated event like an anniversary of some tragic event. the person may not have any idea that is what they are really reacting to and act it out in seemingly unrelated ways. i don't know if that relates to mark at all but she has some very interesting ideas.