I think it might be helpful to go to your relative's funeral. It might give you the chance to speak with your uncle about memories of your mom. I am sure you remember how nice it was to have other people at your mom's service so perhaps you will feel better about attending the services for someone else. If you get there and don't want to sit through the service, there is nothing wrong with excusing yourself to the lobby. Sometimes facing our fears opens us up to experiencing new feelings.