Thanks Tamzin. That helps. Being useless just happens to be probably the worst thing I could be. It's what bothered me most about both of these situations and a lot more in my life. When I feel like I'm not valued and especially like my ideas and my input are considered useless or unwanted, I don't have a reason to exist. I was trying to figure out why I'm hurt by some things more than others, and why I can do well in some jobs or environments and hardly function in others, and it all comes down to feeling like I have a chance to make a useful contribution. I can't deal with feeling useless or unwanted.

Please join in on the growling if you want to. Everybody is welcome to come and growl all they like!

Rap