I didn't marry until I was 39 and often, beforehand, thought many of the thoughts I hear you express. I once started bawling in the middle of a busy, large City, street because I was thinking about going home, alone, to my crummy, little, efficiency apartment and how I probably would be doing that the rest of my life; no warm fire in a fireplace in the winter, no fun/funny dogs, no one to converse with or sit quietly reading beside, etc.

I puzzled over how my best friend from high school had just (in our late 20's) decided she wanted to get married, had joined a square dancing group (not the first place I'd look for an eligible man :-) met the love of her life there and married him. It seemed so "simple" and yet I couldn't figure out how to make it happen for me.

I think some of it is not trying so hard, as we can't really control such things; don't know who we will meet tomorrow much less to marry? I had issues, wasn't sure I was relationship material. I had been in one serious/poorly chosen relationship (hopeless, could not have worked even if he had been willing :-) and had had a pretty serious depressive episode when he made me quit seeing him. I changed jobs and the love of my life showed up, unexpectedly and totally off my radar and with lots of difficulties of his own but we took it a step at a time and five years later, we married (and now it's been over 20 years).

I would "give up" kind of like AkAngel says, just decide it may or may not happen and look to your own life as if it hasn't happened yet :-) Where do you want to live, what do you want to do/be/experience if you don't get married? I'm lucky as I have an 89 year old maiden aunt I've always looked up to and have always had other friends and family friends who were unmarried females that I could look at what they did with their life and fashion my own with them in mind.