Hi dexter,
It certainly does sound like the effects of depression, and I've been there, too--very similar experiences. I'm glad that now you are on meds, and that they seem to be helping a little.

I try not to dwell on my past mistakes from my worst depressive episodes, because I still am haunted by that critical "me" who judges. But other times I can remember that I was very ill with depression, and I'm better now.

Boy do I know that paralyzed feeling, too. It's just awful, and in my case, that critical voice just jumped all over that. Try to give yourself credit for every little thing you DO do...eating something, taking a shower, putting away a dish, etc. We take these tasks for granted, but they are accomplishments just the same. And in each moment, if you can do that, you can keep going.

(((dexter)))

gg