The problem is that for a type II diabetic, starches ARE like soda and little debbie cakes; the spike in blood sugar is identical. In fact, for me, a blood sugar spike from a very small portion of potatoes is actually higher than what I get if I eat a couple hostess cupcakes. When I was newly diagnosed, I had to "demonize" certain foods because that was the only way I could convince myself I didn't want to eat them. Also, it was very hard for me to be around people who were eating those foods...it made me want to eat them, too. I had to quit going out with friends for a while, and my partner could only eat those things outside of the house.

Keep in mind that being diagnosed with a chronic, life-long (very few actually reverse it once past "pre" stage) disorder that has extreme repercussions to every aspect of life, is very scary. Everyone reacts differently to fear.