He needs to understand that you still feel the situation is out of control. It seems like he is thinking that he's given up what he can. If he felt it was really out of control, he would even consider the things he isn't doing at the moment.

I'd suggest counselling as counsellors are well aware that financial issues can break a marriage. Quite often, it's not so much debts or low income that is the worst problem but people's individual ways of dealing with it (or not) that drive them apart.

If he won't see a counsellor with you, then you could try sitting with him and drawing up lists in order of priority - A - things you have to have; B - things that you really don't want to be without but could cope with losing if necessary; C - things that are desirable but not that important; D - things you really don't care much about and could go. If you both put everthing that could improve your income or reduce your outgoings into boxes, it might make him aware that there are shades of importance that maybe he wasn't seeing before. You'd have to be fair about putting things of importance to you in the picture too or he would feel he's doing all the sacrificing.

I hope things work out for you; lots of people are in this situation and I've felt financial strain a lot too. I know how it makes one feel unworthy and in despair. Just remember that althought debt can feel shameful and soul-destroying, there are worst things to be ashamed of.

Re-reading your message, I do think it's worth considering professional debt counsellors if haven't already done so. Bankruptcy is an idea - avoid if possible, but if you are under too much strain it can relieve the pressure. I've known people come through it feeling great relief, but as I say try all other options first. Good luck and hugs xx