Dogs sense things we, as people do not. They give unconditional love--it is why it is so easy for so many to love them, and they are now used as Therapy Dogs for people with PTSD. If you only love them some of the time, as you say, they know it.

Your thread says "I hate my dogs"--is it possible that they sense that you hate them? They are bonded with your grandmother, and not with you?--Perhaps, if you treat them as your grandmother does, they will see you in a different way? Then you can bond with them?

I wish you and your dogs all that is good and healthy in your relationships---theo