kai....there is love in my heart for you....i worry for you alot and i know your life will improve.be strong hun...stay strong.i understand your pain.i feel the pain.our situations are different but the same i was where you are for a long time.we just don't know when things will turn the corner.but they do.you have friends here..i can speak for myself.my heart would ache if something happened to you.you are a good soul....with a purpose.you have a loving heart.it is awful the way things have occurred in your life.i normally would tell my story to let you know i can relate.i can relate.to tell you more would just be a trigger.i think about you all the time.i wish i had a magic fix.i don't,but i know ill come up with something.i know you must think ...she doesn't really care .i do.maybe its because my youth was so much like yours or perhaps it is because i have a son in a situation like yours,whatever the reason...i feel a connection and a sadness that these circumstances are in your life.i am so far from you and i feel helpless from here.be strong and know with a certainty that your life will get better and you will then have the opportunity to help another....from a place in your heart that understands your fellow man.