Last year, a Family therapist (for teenager-parent conflict) told me in front of my child, who raised the issue: “It is NOT NORMAL to break things no matter your motifs”. I told her that I was tired and angry after hours of debating on that object in which I was shouted at… (I am lone with my child and it’s embarrassing when neighbours hear and …) But the therapist repeated: “IT IS NOT NORMAL to break things in any situation: that cell was the PROPERTY OF THE CHILD!” It didn’t matter that I never pointed an object to someone to harm. It didn’t matter that I broke a cell after hours and hours of teenager talking back and shouting at me. It didn’t matter that two times when having a cell (the third one was lost by her and I paid $400 for cancelling) my daughter didn’t use the cell to get in touch with me, telling me when is late, or that I couldn’t ever reach her when in emergency… It didn’t matter that my daughter diagnosed ADHD didn’t sleep text-messaging (ADHD requires routinely and properly sleep) or that I saw her in danger on the street totally un-aware of what’s around other than their interest at the moment) walking on the street and crossing it while doing that!

I had moments in life, when in extreme situations conditions, I felt a huge angry; when children, old, more vulnerable people were put in danger by ignorant or “non-professional” professional people! I consider that I still didn’t hurt to harm yet anyone, but maybe I was just lucky to find other solutions each time. You can feel angry inside and do not show it outside or, when you can’t take it anymore, I think it was better to divert it on an object not on a “being” (people or animals and even a plant!)

Still, I have broken when angry 3 objects, subjects of many hours/days of conflict, in my life, plus slapped MY child 4-5 times, once, in her life!

Do you think that the therapist was meaning that diagnosis for me?