Hi Anne....

Aspiring to be a writer is a wonderful ambition. I share that with you too. Writers say the way to becoming a published writer is to simply write everyday. Set aside some time everyday to write and even if you are blocked you still need to give that time to making the effort. They say that the discipline of a set writing time is key.

Often anxiety sets off obsessive irrational thinking for me in a big way. My head just spins and spins with thoughts that triggers more anxiety and panic. It can help to write about how I am feeling and then using the writing to present a contrasting perspective to that presented by my first thoughts. There is a book called 'The Artist Way' by Julia Cameron that you might want to seek out. It guides you through a 12 week process to 'unlock the artist within'. Basically it disiplines you to write. First thing every morning you write your 'morning pages'. 3 pages of freeflow writing. The thinking is to catch you early before you mind switches into full gear. Its a great practise. When I do it consistently I experience great benefits. I go off and on the practise depending on my sleep patterns it seems.

Can you remember any tricks you learned from the college therapist to cope with your obsessive thoughts? There are lots of benefits to be gained from meditation. There are lots of ways to meditate. The goal is to give your head a break by getting lost in the NOW for a period of time. Acknowledging the thoughts that consume you for a time but letting them pass by while you focus on the moment of time. I often need a helper to do it. Something like a flower or a cloud in the sky or a rock with shapes and cuts to focus on will help me push other thoughts away for a while.

Don't worry about sharing information. I worry about that too and often feel embarrassed after I share something about myself or what I am dealing with. It truth you share far less than you think. You are not nearly as exposed as you imagine. And regardless you are in good company here so it is safe. It is also therapeutic. Like you I have no professional therapist or psych docs helping me with my issues. I have to find my own tools and develop my own coping skills to make it through the hard times. There is lots of information here and all over the web that has taught me coping skills.

Good on you anne for stepping out of your isolation and sharing your need so you can find others who walk in your shoes and can stand with you through this time.

Take good care and try not to think too far ahead or imagine what might happen next. Take some time to just be in the moment. Focus on your breathing and affirm yourself no matter what your thoughts try to stir up in you. Feel your breath and be grateful for each in and out your breath takes. One step at a time. Look and see beauty and rest in its comfort.