((((lonescout))))))))

I am so sorry you are in this position. Yes I think it is selfish, but yet I understand that feeling of wanting to die so desperatly. I've been there. Sometimes I still ask myself that and I have a child and husband. I hope you don't consider this an option anymore since it's been a week or so since you posted this. There are good things out there for you. There have got to be. Take good care of yourself. Drop me a PM if you want to.