oh wow, if my T double booked me I would definitely feel rejection/abandonment, even if I knew it was just an honest mistake on her part.

Also, I think you are so brave to be open and vulnerable w/your T even though it hurts and is scary. You will grow and be stronger because of it. I cannot tolerate being that exposed w/my T and it does hold me back in therapy. You're courageous, Lily!