Sometimes one open, honest discussion can set the tone for the rest of a couple's' communications and make them easier. It doesn't even need to be a discussion. If you can't find a time when you feel confident enough in your abilities to talk, then an e-mail or letter can serve much the same fashion. Face to face or even verbal conversing can be difficult. Sometimes a more distant and detached form of communication can actually aid in getting the message across.

Thus, I'd try to tell him these things in one of the above fashions - if you can. Maybe even link this thread if you can't. When my boyfriend starts getting too invasive, just letting him know and setting up some more personal boundaries is often quite helpful. It helps him understand better what I'm going through and what he needs to do and not do to help. I also have to tell him that sometimes I need space to just be myself and get my emotions out without him prying. Since your guy seems like he's really trying, maybe he'd be open and acquiescent to similar requests?

I also understand where you're coming from regarding your daughter. Until you guys work out an arrangement that yields mostly comfortable interaction (and this does take work), I get how him moving in might just be overwhelming for you, as well. If you love him, then I'd probably try to work on this though and find a good place with one another, so you can all take a step which may provide added happiness. If not, then I'd find it almost more important to communicate your need for solid boundaries. I, personally, would be very, very put off by someone I didn't feel for pushing their way into the personal parts of my life.

Either way, hope it goes well for you. G'luck!