My gma still thinks that i am not bipolar... I guess since my cuz bethany is, means i cant be. I MUST be copying her... This is what i get.. My gma doesnt want me labled as bipolar. OK. What is wrong with this label? She tells me no one will accept me with this disorder and that i will never get a good job if i was diagnosed. What can i do about it. I have this disorder. Weather she likes it or not.. SO does my cousin So HYMMMMMMMMMMMM i wonder wich one gave it to us. My gma (likley) or my Gpa. I know my mom has it.. She is a flipin psycho. I know my uncle has it. Cause he married a psycho and hates his own daughter. Soo i dont get this family..
when my mom found out i was cutting my grandma said i was doing this to get attention and back to her. So she basically didnt beleive me. But when bethany started cutting 2 i repeat 2 years after i started she beleives her and says its her family that is the cause of it. DID I MISS SOMETHING? When beth became bulimic it was all a big deal to gma. IM bulimic and she says that i do it for attention. YA some attention. I ben self inflicted for 5 years, depressed for 7, bipolar for a record of 3 weeks, General anxiety and panic disorder (which she doesnt beleive i have) for 5 years, and bulimic for 4 months. Beth has been self inflicted for 3 years, depressed for god who knows how long, bipolar for 4 years, bulimic for 4 years, and a drug addict for 5 years.Oh lets not forget 3 months pregnant. AND IM THE ONE THATS FAKING. dont get me wrong i know my cousin wasnt faking. she was allways the princess of the family and i was the perfect representation of the family. When the princess failed its up to me to pick up her slack. So the strings get tighter and i am forced to be more perfect. So beth can still be the princess who gets her butt wiped and served too. I am the dissapointment cause im not the perfect image that this family wants me to be. Maybe if i did meth and Screwed every guy in town maybe JUST MAYBE i would be treated like her. Makes me want to go out and get drunk take a bunch of prozac and crap and screw everyone who looks at me...

Sotrry if this is very long. needed to vent..