Yoda, thanks for the post! I can relate as I have been setting more limits over the years with my abuser, and because of the family enmeshment not seeing her also means not seeing my grandfather who is now 96. It's hard because my mom passed away when I was 20, and up until the last few years, it's been my role to take care of them for her.
One thing my T reminds me that is helpful- I can set limits without getting into great detail with family. Maybe your situation is different, but I feel complelled to 'thouroughly explain' my actions, when often a simple "I don't want to see X anymore, I get too upset when I do" often will suffice.
Byz is right, only you can decide the best way to handle it- sometimes I find it helfpul to journal or mentally rehearse a few scenarios before I settle on one.
Good luck- keep us posted!