My addictions Dr. asked me an interesting question when I was seeing her in a one on one counselling session earlier this week. This was in context of my depression. I've suffered from depression on and off for more than 20 years, and am heavily medicated. I'm in another depressive episode at the moment despite the meds. My pdoc has suggested adding another med to my mix to treat it, and I was talking about it and being nervous about it. Her question made me really think. I answered yes I believe I can because I have to believe it. Also I've had periods in the past when I've not been depressed and have been happy, so I know it's possible. But that's not the whole answer I realized because I don't believe I'll ever be cured. I've had so many depressive episodes that I believe I'll be on meds for life, and that at best my depression can be managed.

The question is also relevant, perhaps more so, to my alcoholism. I have had periods of sobriety in the past, and am in another one now, however I have a long history of relapsing. Right now I'm taking a med so that I can't drink. And I don't think I'll ever get better. I know addiction is a long term progressive illness that isn't cured, so I have to learn to manage it, and live without alcohol, but I honestly can't imagine a time when I won't have to struggle with it, which to me is not better. It's coping.

So how do you feel? Do you believe you'll get better?

--splitimage