Yes and no. We have talked about how I have no friends. And have even joked about how I can't find the "friendship store". I keep looking, but haven't found one yet.

I think that part of my problem with the situation is this: Somehow I have fallen into a funk again. I have periods of time where I want to do something about it. I have talked myself through the day so I'm productive. (which I can't do unless I take stimulant type medication and even with that it's a struggle) And then I talk w/ T and feel better. Sorta. But it's like I'm just wanting company. Sorta like a friend. I'm just wanting someone in my life to share tidbits of my day, someone to vent to and talk me through it. Anyone. Then I get frustrated that I need him. And get irritated that I am scheduling my work around my therapy appointments. And then I get the reminder of me paying him to be in my life when I get the weekly EOB from the insurance. It's depressing when I look at the whole picture. And then I get upset that I NEED him. And wonder to myself why bother when I don't have anything else? Why bother with all this? I feel like it's not worth it to go and then seeing how much it costs. Just makes me upset that I'm in this situation. Frustrated that I have gotten myself attached to my T. Even though I fought it so damn hard. I don't want to need him.