Hello PC Cloud

The recent challenge with my T (see Why do I care where the Therapist sits?) has led to termination.

Initially I was quite distressed about both the change and the lack of discussion. I returned the following week and adapted to the change of seats - thanks to all who engaged in discussion with me in the other thread. I returned again this week, and in trying to get a better understanding of why T did not try to discuss the change with me, he gave me the recommendation that I should probably take a break.

I've definitely lost much of my trust in T, he has little credibility with me at this point - he asked this and I said yes.
I pointed out that 2 wk before the incident, I shared something very personal and provoking - I really felt safe at that point - and he pulled WAY back after that and I connect the two. He gave a non-committal "I can see that"
I've definitely got little faith that he won't repeat this kind of "no dialog" approach in the future, since it has happened previously (Dec, Sept, July, April 2009) and I have no sense that he gets outside support for dealing with his side of the issue. My intuition is that he was so wrapped up in his discomfort that he did not handle it well (told him so, he said "That's certainly possible"). I'm tired of his discomfort intruding on my therapy in a hurtful way - geez, he's supposed to work on that out of my view!

What challenges me is that he's pulled back further, writing: "You have to decide for yourself. I'm not going to advocate or encourage." There is no dialog about the value of the therapeutic relationship. (He's on a salary, so losing a regular client does not impact his income.)

Right now I'm willing to listen to him if there is something he's like to talk about re:therapeutic relationship, but know I cannot do therapy with him, cannot sit down and talk about my stuff. So, a break is in order in any case.

Am I expecting too much? Does the therapist have no, some or equal responsibility for the relationship? Are we doing therapy with a "therapist", a universally interchangeable human, or a specific person who is engaging with us as we are engaging in return?
I've considered that my role in this failure is that I truly did not understand the therapeutic relationship, that it is my internal construct and mine alone to maintain or discontinue.

Any thoughts for me?