sj, I understand this is confusing for you. A few years ago my mother started recieving back child support checks from one of my abusers. The state of KY was garnishing his pay. I was really upset about my mother getting this checks and flashing them in front of me. I had filed charges against him when I was 16 and went through questioning. My T asked me if I wanted to have him arrested since the state knew where he was now? I had to say no. Because at this point I knew that I'm not in a place where I can put myself up to facing him. Then I think about the what if's? I worry that he's continued to abuse. But I had to do what was in my best interest at this time. And that's what you have to think about. Are you in a place to confront him or are you safe enough to know that you wouldn't take revenge out on him? I knew that I have alters that I knew I couldn't trust and could land me into trouble. You can go through a lot of what if's and pro's and con's. But it all really just depends on how strong you feel you are and what you feel like you want to do. Good Luck, Monty