Well, after the worst depression I have ever been through I had no choice but to go back on my meds. I literally could not function, so I finally went to see the pdoc and we decided I should go back on the meds. The difference is amazing. The positive part of this is that I truly see now that I do need medication (I have questioned it for four years), but the negative is that I have to put my pregnancy plans on hold. My pdoc still thinks it is possible, but we have decided that I need to taper the meds more slowly. I feel so much better that I am not discouraged by this. I just know that it is going to take longer than I initially wanted.