((((( zoo )))))))) Can you do something with artwork today to show T how you are feeling about things? Reading and thinking about your post just inspired me to do exactly that. There are some serious abandonment issues I need to face head on with T this Wed in session. And I am terrified of it. I am so afraid of that "needing" feeling I have when feelings come up and I want T but T is not sitting there. So learning how to do other coping things is better. I do like the look on T's face when I show him my therapy feeling artwork - he tends to know when it is real stuff and not just shallow stuff. And his eyes light up like he is honestly proud of me for showing my feelings to him. I think that I relish that response from T because I never got that from my parents. They just expected me to be what they wanted even though they made it very hard for me to be who I was. Hope that makes sense and helps you a little maybe?