pachyderm----I think it's all in the dynamics of the family. I know I have two older brothers who abused me as a child, also, my father...later on, a therapist---on and on it went.

I knew how it felt to be helpless; I was taught Helplessness before memory. So I went on with my life-of course, I married an abusive man--it was all I knew.

I think I wanted them to love me; but they were incapable of that feeling--too self-absorbed--sociopaths.
It has taken my whole life to come to this realization: There are those who prey,
and those who are preyed upon.

So, now, I just steer clear of the preyers; I know who they are, I have a history of
knowing who they are.

I don't know what causes it either..............................theo