i think both can be good options. there are different levels of intimacy and i think most people need the various types of intimacy found from a variety of relationships. sometimes people expect a spouse to meet all their emotional needs and i don't think that is really possible.

i've always found the idea of intentional communities intriguing and i know they are on the rise these days. it is probably something that takes a lot of research and planning though to do successfully. from what i know there are many different types as well. it can be something as simple as 6 people all renting a large house together. i definitely wouldn't rush into one because if you end up not getting along well with the people it could be rather unpleasant. a lot of things would need to be worked out up front too i.e. money arrangements, cleaning, meals, etc. it might be worth putting out feelers with existing friends or friends that you are making as you've gotten to know them a bit. is there something that would be a common interest that would be tying the community together e.g. the arts, a particular faith, green living?

i do think what eskielover said about letting relationships form naturally is important too. we can put ourselves in places to be open to relationships but they really can't be forced. there is a spontaneity to relationships that make them authentic and special.

it's an interesting topic.