I want to thank everyone that responded to my post with kind words and advice. Today was not a good day and I feel like s**t. I new the manic phase was coming but I felt so good that I didn't care. Today the anger and irritability kicked in and I yelled at my baby...more than once. I tried not to and she was just being a typical 3 year old but it was like I just couldn't handle her today. I called my niece to try and get her to take her for a couple of hours so that I could try and relax and get myself together but she didn't answer her phone. I feel so bad. I don't want her to grow up remembering a mother that yelled at her all the time. I can't do that to her, she deserves so much more. I'm going to make sure my doc sees me tomorrow, I don't care if I have to sit in the reception area all day, I don't care if I have to make a scene by crying or screaming or whatever. All I know is that I can never do that to her again. Never.