while i'm very honest intellectually i'm not so honest emotionally with people because i tend to be so afraid of offending others. i guess i don't want to be the bad guy...or bad girl in my case. i tend to be rather direct, so i'm so afraid that when i'm honest emotionally i'll come across too harsh. but the people pleasing and accommodating has gotten really old. i just end up feeling resentful and people take advantage because i let them.

so, i was honest with a neighbor that i am annoyed by something she did. the communication has been thru email, she initially emailed me, and now i'm worried i probably came across much harsher than i intended because of her not being able to see my tone. so, then i start obsessing about it all and worrying about what the other person thinks.

this neighbor asked me to switch parking spots and i didn't think it would really work for her having two cars and told her, but i agreed after she kept saying it would work. so, after a couple of months, and her most likely realizing i was right, now she wants to switch back after she went and sold off one of her cars. there really is no need for her to switch back now except that it's just generally a hard spot to get out of even with one car. i don't want it back and like the new spot much better for the most part. i grudgingly agreed in the email to switch back and was honest i wasn't thrilled about it but now i'm all worried my email came across too harsh. it's a small building and she's the condo association president so i don't want to cause a stink, but i know i can't keep being so accommodating all the time. i figure i have to at least be honest that i didn't like what she's done so she won't push my boundaries like this again. this isn't really the first time i've felt pushed by her. generally, she's a nice person but i've felt my views were disregarded before in dealing with her--only to be proven right later although she's never acknowledged that--and she's pushed hard for her way which hasn't worked in the long run. ugh, setting boundaries and being emotionally honest are so hard!