Anpao,
I'm no expert, but I am familiar with depression. I have experienced it all my life. Things seem hopeless now, but they will get better. Time is your friend. If you are feeling hopeless and sad, try getting out of the house and going somewhere... perhaps somewhere with people. I find that it helps soo much even though all I want to do is sit at home in the dark and listen to Type O-Negative all night. We've all been there. I feel for you.