It sounds like you are feeling very depressed. There are coping skills to help you work through these periods. Some suggestions are DBT, journaling, posting here and researching about bipolar illnes. There is volumes of information available. Another suggestion is doing whatever you normally enjoy doing even though it may not seem so enticing right now.

It sounds like you have a pdoc since you have been dx'd recently. Dlid they prescibe meds for you? It is also very helpful to talk to them as they understand the illness and can help you work through these periods.

I hope you realize that you really are not a different person but your illness has just been recognized. It has been there all along. I hope you utilize the help you have available to learn to live with bipolar illness and information concerning it. .

Good luck in learning how to live with your illness. Keep posting.