I haven't been sleeping well. I feel so anxious tonight. I don't know who I am or what will become of me. I know I am the one responsible for my life, but that hasn't worked out so well for me so far. All I can think is "what am I going to do?" over and over. Therapy is helping, I know. But on the other hand sometimes all it does is throw these questions back at me to answer. It feels like it's going to take forever. I feel so tired and very confused.
I'm worried about not pulling my weight in my relationship, and being too much of a burden due to depression and past issues that I just can't seem to shake.
I'm worried that I can't be strong and independent and in control of my life while also being in a relationship with someone else (child of an alcoholic thing I guess).
Also I have a medical issue that is getting worse and I'm worried. I need to see a doc but they're all booked up and it's been so difficult to find one. I have one last option in calling my insurance directly but even that I can't do until after the holiday, which makes me feel concerned.

Sorry about my rambling tonight. It just feels better to put it down here.

E