So that is the goal of therapy, of self healing, to learn skills and try them out in the real world. Well, I am not sure that I will be able to describe this or not but here goes.

In my life I am a what you see is what you get person. I am honest even when I should not be and have shot myself in the foot several tiomes because of this.

I for some really weird reason considering my history, expect my colleagues and other people in my life to be straight forward and honest as well. Sometimes gossip will get back to me and I will be surprised and confused. I don't work that way.

In my job I have people I do NOT really like to deal with. They feel dishonest to me and I am careful with them but I am always kind and respectful. That is who I am. I am not mean.

Okay, so here I constantly see stuff happening here on this board that I have no clue about. We are hurting eachother and doing damage instead of helping? Are we trying out our life skills here before going to the broader world? Or, are we allowing ourselves to be dysfunctional because it's somewhat annonomous and it's a board?

How can we learn from the problems we see here? How can we not get affected by the dynamics that we don't even see or know about but then Bam, it happens, someone is devastated to the heart and leaves us. That hurts me so much to imagine that suffering and pain that makes people want to go away and be annonomous. Another member did the same thing recently.

What can we do to stop this place from becoming a war zone? I am here for support, the giving and the getting. I am here for loving as I know it is a possibility for each of us to love others in a respectful celebratory kind of way.

It's not to say that I haven't had issues with some posters or what they have said, just that I don't need to fight that battle. We are all different and have to choose our own battles.

For me, I come here because my life is a battle and i am tired and I look here for support. I get smiles from replies and understanding and a sense of not being so alone.

It seems like for me this should be our focus here, this above as well as sharing information, comforting, or keeping our mouths shut when what we are going to reply to someone will escalate a situation rather then helping.

Just thoughts from the dark. I want unconditional love and positive high regard.