I think this says important things about how you feel and what you want.

You want to feel that you are seen.
You want to feel that you are heard.
You want to matter.

Those are not selfish things at all. They are about your 'self', about wanting to have that 'self' loved, respected, and cared about. It is so healthy to want.

The fantasy that others would suffer with the realization of how much they care about you is created by you as a way of saying to yourself just how much you want these people to care about you and how much it hurts that they don't seem to. What if they do? What if they do but there is something getting in the way of your feeling it or being able to hold onto that feeling. Something in the way they interact with you, or expectations that have that don't match yours.

This kind of fantasy is also a not so obvious revenge fantasy. The revenge for not caring is to take yourself away. Do you currently take yourself away in other ways? I think I do that, and I think it has the same revenge kind of motivation for me. I isolate, avoid social things or attend with lack of presence, etc.

An interesting thought, The Bakery. Will you explore this more in therapy?