I'll get right to it.....everything is falling apart all at once...my relationship sucks right now. We have been together 15 yrs and we have both been in long term and also were married before..2 children for me with my ex and 1 with my current relationship..he has no other children.

I suffer with the lost of my children (taken by there father) many years ago, met my current relationship 18 months after and we have been together since meeting....at that time he was the answer to my prayers such a loving ,caring ,nurturing person who took me a stranger into his life and we had a great passionate, sexual, stormy relationship and now we are just stormy.....I have always said you know a person by his past by the amount of friends he still has from his past especially if there friends from when he was a kid. Everybody likes him he makes friends easily.The problem is, is us together as a couple..we are so very much the same it's like living with yourself...stubborn, opinionated controling, loving, would do anything for anyone. But now we argue every time we speak to each other...we do not get along at all plus he says thing that are very mean he knows what I have been thru but yet he will use it against me every time we argue.

He has no patience with stupid people so he says..he is mentally abusive with me...but than he will apologize later and say how sorry he is and than we will argue again and do it all over again..I feel like a yoyo...when I am angry with him I will ask him to leave but he won't...he says not until our child is older he says he will not leave him and that he needs a mom and dad and I do agree but exposing our son to this toxic relationship is not right and the frustrating thing is he will agree.

I am dealing with trying to get my daughter home from the country where she is , but it is a Muslim country and there laws are so strict when it comes to women that it's almost a hopeless situation but we still talk and it has been very hard on me, I feel so helpless I can't help her...well my husband gets so upset that this is hurting me and we end up arguing because he says he wants to help..but his idea of helping is telling me I am doing everything all wrong. Instead of hugging he rants and raves about how no one else would put up with this s*#t and he's getting tiried of it and how much money it's costing for the long distance and how I'm taking away from my family.....I understand his frustration but he takes it out on me and yells at me and it just upsets me more and I say things like "how can you say those things" so than I am more upset...he is very good at saying mean things when he's upset I always say he is a master at it but I just end up in tears...says I have a big fat mouth and don't know how to keep it shut.

I am not saying he is wrong but his "tough love" as he put's it is not working because it just makes me angry...what do I do this is ruining our life it does not stop my son even wants us to seperate and that coming from a 12 yr old breaks my heart..what are we teaching him...I want my man to be a man and not a bully to me....is it me? I am beginning to question. I suffer from PTSD and Generalized anxiety on top of peri-menopause and he says it's all in my head and again when he's angry he will tell me that I am mental.....like, what gives ,why is he so mean..he will role his eyes when I tell him my heart is racing and I feel scared and my anxiety is thru the roof and he will just say something mean and push me away and say you need help.....sarcastically! I am so upset...my anxiety symptoms are at it's extreme high and am resulting in taking an Ativan and it's been 2 yrs since I had to take something...was so proud I was doing well and could do it on my own....but now.....not sure